Tziporah Kinsbury Helps Professionals Learn to Navigate Everyday Intimacy & Make Better Connections

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[00:00] SPEAKER_02: Welcome to Canada's podcast, the number one podcast for entrepreneurs by
[00:06] SPEAKER_02: entrepreneurs. Hello this is Robert Smilakim to today with Vancouver's podcast, a
[00:12] SPEAKER_02: member of the Canada's podcast network where we talk to the entrepreneurs who are
[00:16] SPEAKER_02: making it happen here in Vancouver, British Columbia. Separa Kingsbury is an
[00:22] SPEAKER_02: intimacy and a mindful relating educator, transformational leader and breath
[00:27] SPEAKER_02: work specialist. She has shared her services globally with high achieving
[00:32] SPEAKER_02: consciously minded professionals, men and couples to cultivate their most
[00:36] SPEAKER_02: potent self-expression and build skills to navigate everyday intimacy and
[00:42] SPEAKER_02: thriving connections. Her vision is to embody and support others in feeling safe
[00:48] SPEAKER_02: in their own bodies and cultivating an unprecedented level of presence and
[00:53] SPEAKER_02: radical aliveness be it in their private or professional life. Well Separa,
[01:00] SPEAKER_02: welcome to the show. Thanks for taking the time today to be here for all our listeners.
[01:04] SPEAKER_02: Thank you, Robert. I'm excited for our conversation. Great. Okay. I want you to tell us a
[01:09] SPEAKER_02: little bit more about yourself, where you're from and give us the details on your
[01:13] SPEAKER_01: current business. That could be a really long story. So I was born actually in
[01:21] SPEAKER_01: Connecticut, which is actually in America in the States. And I always tell the
[01:27] SPEAKER_01: joke that I think who I was dropped in a little bit too soon. I think they were
[01:31] SPEAKER_01: heading towards Canada and they forgotten. So Canada has been home for me for
[01:40] SPEAKER_01: about 10 years now. And it's always felt like home for me with community
[01:45] SPEAKER_01: hearing connections here. But being born in the States and I always find my work as
[01:54] SPEAKER_01: has been inspired by wanting to just see a different world connect differently,
[02:03] SPEAKER_01: communicate differently, people feel safe in their bodies, people feel for people to
[02:08] SPEAKER_01: feel more authentic to be who they are in the world. And it's been a part of my mission
[02:13] SPEAKER_01: for most of my life. And I've created an ideal living situation where I can travel the world,
[02:20] SPEAKER_01: most of the time sharing my work through seminars, through public speaking, through online
[02:26] SPEAKER_01: mentoring and consulting, as well as most recently being a bestselling author, which writing
[02:34] SPEAKER_01: now really excites me as a new platform to reach the masses out there with this message.
[02:40] SPEAKER_02: Great. Okay. Now, did you need financing to start your company? How do you currently
[02:45] SPEAKER_01: make money in your business now? Good question. So yeah, you know, it's,
[02:52] SPEAKER_01: it was unknown to me at the time of starting a business really how much it would take,
[02:58] SPEAKER_01: you know, as potentially maybe a lot of entrepreneurs we follow our passions and our dreams.
[03:04] SPEAKER_01: And that's exactly what I've done. I did not get to where I am today by
[03:12] SPEAKER_01: practical thinking, I should say. I'm not quite a practical thinker. I'm a dreamer and a
[03:16] SPEAKER_01: visionary. But when it comes to finances, I think what's taken, what what I've seen
[03:22] SPEAKER_01: taken place in my business and my career is people have been so inspired by my message and
[03:31] SPEAKER_01: my service to the world that I've received a lot of funding. There's definitely been a really high,
[03:40] SPEAKER_01: it's challenging. We're looking at the numbers, a really high level of investment from
[03:44] SPEAKER_01: from creating various platforms to, you know, the appropriate web pages to to book editors and
[03:51] SPEAKER_01: literary architects and to keep things going. And one of the things that's really presently
[03:58] SPEAKER_01: alive for me in my business is I'm ready more so than ever to let go of multitasking and just
[04:08] SPEAKER_01: really show up and teach and do what I do. And I find that does take the financial investment,
[04:13] SPEAKER_01: but more so even finding that perfect, the perfect team to come together who are also inspired by
[04:20] SPEAKER_02: the permission. Okay, what is the long-term vision and what will your company look like in the future?
[04:26] SPEAKER_02: Do you see the company expanding into areas and where beyond Vancouver, BC or even Canada?
[04:33] SPEAKER_01: I'm already global, so I do foresee the business reaching more people on a global level.
[04:41] SPEAKER_01: We actually are most recently in the talks of even turning my vision and my programs into more of,
[04:48] SPEAKER_01: I don't like the word franchise, but into more of training people to do what I do. So when I'm
[04:56] SPEAKER_02: going to see the work in the world. Okay, let's talk a little bit about Vancouver now.
[05:02] SPEAKER_02: And what it looks like for you doing business here. What are the biggest benefits for you in being an entrepreneur
[05:07] SPEAKER_02: here in Vancouver? I want you to give us some of the good points about starting a company here,
[05:12] SPEAKER_02: but I also want you to give us some of the tough things or the challenges for our listeners so they
[05:16] SPEAKER_01: can keep an eye for them. Yeah, yeah. One of the pluses as an entrepreneur here in Vancouver,
[05:24] SPEAKER_01: I find this community. And I say that because there's just as we know, there's so many entrepreneurs
[05:29] SPEAKER_01: up here and most of the people I know and their friends with, there's a beautiful form of relating
[05:36] SPEAKER_01: and tribe and connection and I find that's very uplifting in having my own business.
[05:44] SPEAKER_01: The challenge is up here and I would say in all honesty, it's anywhere in the world is
[05:52] SPEAKER_01: keeping things going and always being out there to plug into the right people at the right time
[05:59] SPEAKER_01: to me that is the most challenging thing, whether it's in Vancouver or anywhere in the world.
[06:04] SPEAKER_02: Okay, let's talk a bit about work and how you do work in the city. We do some of our best work
[06:11] SPEAKER_02: outside the office. Is there a place in the lower mainland close to where you live or work,
[06:15] SPEAKER_02: where you like to go recharge or get inspired with ideas or just think about your business and
[06:20] SPEAKER_02: doesn't change with the season considering all the rain we get here. Yes, it definitely changes
[06:27] SPEAKER_01: with the season. This is actually, so I live here six months a year. I actually travel six months
[06:33] SPEAKER_01: and I live here six months and I will say this is my first winter in Vancouver and it is definitely
[06:38] SPEAKER_01: not my season for creativity. The longer days, the brighter days definitely inspire. I wrote
[06:47] SPEAKER_01: most of my book up here, so definitely inspires more creativity. I'm finding the bear in me comes out
[06:54] SPEAKER_01: during the winter season favorite plays. I'm actually right in the west end right now. I love
[06:59] SPEAKER_01: walking the seawall or going into the forest for inspiration. There's so much life there to
[07:06] SPEAKER_01: take it in so much stillness. I might find when I'm still it's where I could be more creative.
[07:12] SPEAKER_01: It's where my ideas come through with greater ease. Okay, we have a lot of international listeners.
[07:18] SPEAKER_02: So this next question I want you to speak to them. If you were to start all over again and you just
[07:23] SPEAKER_02: moved here to Vancouver, VC, but this time you don't know anyone knowing what you know now,
[07:28] SPEAKER_02: what would you do and how would you go about starting all over again as an entrepreneur?
[07:33] SPEAKER_01: Wow, that's a huge question.
[07:42] SPEAKER_01: I think if I was just moving here, I would have a little bit set in motion before I got here.
[07:50] SPEAKER_01: I would have begun cultivating relationships in the sense of doing a lot of outreach through
[07:59] SPEAKER_01: research through email correspondence and just saying hello to people who are potentially in
[08:07] SPEAKER_01: the similar fields or entrepreneurs so that when I landed here, it could there could already be
[08:15] SPEAKER_01: connections happening because what I find again even though we're talking about business and
[08:19] SPEAKER_01: my business is the business of intimacy is that even in the business world, often what's lacking
[08:25] SPEAKER_01: is intimate connection and I do find that by creating and cultivating a tribe ahead of time or
[08:31] SPEAKER_01: some form of connections is that would feel like greater ease in my body and my nervous system
[08:38] SPEAKER_01: and the outcome would be more productivity and creativity. So kind of establish things before
[08:45] SPEAKER_01: you landed and then a little bit. Yeah, plant seeds for sure. Plant seeds. See the research.
[08:52] SPEAKER_02: What does the first hour look like for you when you get up in the morning? Do you have a specific
[08:55] SPEAKER_02: routine or a ritual that helps you get motivated to start your day? Yes, I have about two hours.
[09:02] SPEAKER_01: So I get up in the morning and I do prayer and ritual and I actually go into a full hour of
[09:12] SPEAKER_01: vipassana meditation and it's basically body awareness and scanning a conscious awareness from
[09:19] SPEAKER_01: head to toe throughout the whole body for an hour and then I go into journaling my dreams in
[09:24] SPEAKER_01: the night before and that takes I would say a good 90 minutes to two hours and then I find I'm
[09:31] SPEAKER_02: ready for my day. Okay, do you think entrepreneurs have to be weird or unique in a positive way or
[09:39] SPEAKER_01: are wired in different ways? Yeah, you know, I find entrepreneurs are very creative.
[09:49] SPEAKER_01: More creative than than norm. They also have this sense of
[09:55] SPEAKER_01: not as much like they don't live confined by fear so much. They just want to
[10:00] SPEAKER_01: they sometimes thrive more by taking those unknown leaps and that seems more exciting for them.
[10:09] SPEAKER_02: Right, so it's a matter of just being able to go on the edge, so to speak. They like the edge.
[10:15] SPEAKER_01: They seem to like the edge and there's definitely the s'more of a spark of creativity and not
[10:20] SPEAKER_01: not a fear of getting something wrong, right? Entrepreneurs are always out there and we do make a lot
[10:27] SPEAKER_02: of mistakes and we just learn by them. Okay, what books are you reading now and why or even
[10:32] SPEAKER_02: audio books and can you recommend any books for our listeners who are also aspiring entrepreneurs?
[10:38] SPEAKER_01: That's the I have actually sitting right next to me. I am reading by Joe D'Spenza, a book called
[10:44] SPEAKER_01: Evolve Your Brain and I find for me like I don't actually read books on business on entrepreneur.
[10:56] SPEAKER_01: I read books more on my work itself and so evolving the brain. It's again how how can I cultivate more
[11:04] SPEAKER_01: of an awareness with my body, my emotional body, my psyche so I can be more present and available
[11:12] SPEAKER_02: and in the know how for my clients. Okay, let's talk about your online or offline tools that you
[11:19] SPEAKER_02: like to use on a daily basis. You think specific Skype zoom? I love zoom. I love zoom very much. I find
[11:27] SPEAKER_01: zoom. It's crisper. It's clearer. I love the recording aspect when it's compared to Skype. I find
[11:35] SPEAKER_01: yeah, there's much clearer reception with zoom. I love it. The other thing that I absolutely love
[11:40] SPEAKER_01: when I do live interviews is be live and some people I've heard really don't like it for me. It's
[11:49] SPEAKER_01: so I'm non-techy. So to have something that simple and easy that I can just plug in press a button
[11:55] SPEAKER_01: and I can go live on an interview on say a Facebook platform instantly and it saves and records it
[12:02] SPEAKER_01: for me. I highly recommend looking at it checking it out. Okay, thank you for NBC. A very outdoorsy
[12:09] SPEAKER_02: place. We've got everything here. You name it mountains, rivers, lakes, ocean. You can do
[12:15] SPEAKER_02: practically anything here. How do you balance work and how do you relax and not think about work?
[12:20] SPEAKER_02: What are your favorite activities to do here in BC? Do you ski, do you bike, kayak, golf, hike,
[12:25] SPEAKER_01: or simply go for a drive? Yeah, so I am blessed to have a job that's very exciting and joyful. I don't
[12:35] SPEAKER_01: feel that my work and my personal life end and that's probably just because of the field that I'm in.
[12:42] SPEAKER_01: But to connect, I connect on a daily basis. I live right by the forest. So I am out at least
[12:48] SPEAKER_01: walking in fresh air every day, hiking last year. I think I was last year. I went kayaking off grid
[12:55] SPEAKER_01: with with orcas. I came like 10 feet within a pod of orcas. So I definitely feel the outdoors for me
[13:01] SPEAKER_02: fuels me a lot. Yeah, that sounds very cool. To be at this very specific northwest,
[13:08] SPEAKER_02: yeah, kayaking with with the orcas, right? You can get closer than that. Yeah. Okay, if you were doing
[13:15] SPEAKER_02: what you do now, what would you like to do for a profession? If I wasn't doing what I do now?
[13:22] SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you weren't doing what you do now. What would you like to do?
[13:30] SPEAKER_01: When I was younger, I wanted to be a singer. Okay. Yeah, I would be a performing artist. I think
[13:38] SPEAKER_01: that would be a lot of fun. Singer, like in a band or just like... I have a rock band.
[13:42] SPEAKER_02: There you go. Rock and roll. Okay. What kind of a job would you not like to do? Couldn't do it?
[13:50] SPEAKER_01: Oh, I couldn't work for somebody else. Yeah, I couldn't work at 95. I have worked at 95
[13:58] SPEAKER_01: job before in my younger years. And just I was so unhappy. So definitely not a 95, not in the office
[14:06] SPEAKER_02: setting. In business, what is your favorite word quote or sentence that you like to use?
[14:16] SPEAKER_01: We must be able to feel everything in order to create sustainable change in our life.
[14:26] SPEAKER_02: Okay. What's your least favorite word or sentence you do not like to hear?
[14:33] SPEAKER_01: I have a strong, when people say, when people wish someone feeling. It's very interesting.
[14:42] SPEAKER_01: Yes, I don't like people to say I wish you to be field or something like that.
[14:47] SPEAKER_02: Okay. If you had to pick one or two words to describe yourself, what would it be in why?
[14:58] SPEAKER_00: Unique. Unique. Unique. And you said two words or one.
[15:09] SPEAKER_00: One or two. One or two. I would say just extremely unique and one of the kind.
[15:16] SPEAKER_02: What keeps you up at night if anything?
[15:25] SPEAKER_01: Expectations of myself, if I'm kind of living really attached to having high expectations of myself.
[15:32] SPEAKER_01: Okay. High achiever. High achiever and not happy with what I do that day.
[15:39] SPEAKER_02: Always striving for more. Okay. I want you to give us the top three shangs on your inspired
[15:44] SPEAKER_02: lifelessness. This can be whether you want to write books, where you put your biographies or if you
[15:49] SPEAKER_02: want to do a TEDx talk or if you want to do philanthropy travel more. Anything like that?
[15:55] SPEAKER_01: Yeah. I'm looking to do a TED talk, TEDx talk within the next year. That's a huge intention of mine.
[16:03] SPEAKER_01: I would love to do more outreach in different countries. I'd love to,
[16:07] SPEAKER_01: and part of that I feel which would be number three is definitely more travel. I'd like to get back to Africa.
[16:14] SPEAKER_02: Anywhere in particular?
[16:18] SPEAKER_01: No, anywhere. I've been to Southeast. I've been to Zambia and Zababway so far and I just look
[16:25] SPEAKER_02: for our tea's ever and more. Okay. Do you have any advice that you may have received that you can
[16:34] SPEAKER_01: pass on to entrepreneurs throughout British Columbia? Yeah. Yeah. I remember one of my mentors
[16:42] SPEAKER_01: when I would self critique or push myself really, really hard or just not give my self credit.
[16:49] SPEAKER_01: And he would say to me, because I'd ask me, you know, if client flow got low, I'd be like, what's
[16:55] SPEAKER_01: going on? Why isn't this happening? And then he sat on me, he's like, when you focus, I'm taking care
[17:02] SPEAKER_01: of yourself. And you feel like you are thriving, you know, physically, emotionally, mentally. He's
[17:09] SPEAKER_01: like, that is when your phone is going to ring off the hook. He's like, but if you're not doing that
[17:15] SPEAKER_01: and you're feeling drained and tired and just running yourself right in, that's when you stop getting
[17:21] SPEAKER_01: those vocals. So that's a huge reminder to put our oxygen mask on first. So putting positive
[17:27] SPEAKER_02: eyes out into the universe, it'll come back to you. Yeah, and self care, lots of self care. I think
[17:33] SPEAKER_02: entrepreneurs forget about self care. Okay. Well, speaking of self care support,
[17:39] SPEAKER_02: do you already have some fun? Yes. Okay. Great. Well, as you know, entrepreneurs are very,
[17:46] SPEAKER_02: very busy people and we're always connected, always on the go, and it sometimes never stops.
[17:52] SPEAKER_02: We're going to take you away from all that. There's a small tropical island just off of Fiji
[17:56] SPEAKER_02: that only has one phone booth there. There is no internet. And yes, this place does exist.
[18:03] SPEAKER_02: We're going to drop you off there. You won't have us computer or smartphone or tablet. You can
[18:07] SPEAKER_02: use the phone booth located there any time to call the boat. We'll come pick you up. How long
[18:13] SPEAKER_02: would you last before you made that call? And what would you do while you were there?
[18:18] SPEAKER_01: Like, you just drew a picture of my ideal life. I could go forever without making that call.
[18:26] SPEAKER_01: I am a junkie to silence and I sit in Ted David Potsman. So I could potentially even go
[18:33] SPEAKER_01: month before I made that call to be honest. And I would be in absolute heaven. As long as I had
[18:41] SPEAKER_01: a comfortable place to sleep and I'd be happy. It's some good food. I'd be happy.
[18:47] SPEAKER_01: Yeah. You have everything there. Just no internet. Oh, you know, my body and my mind would be
[18:52] SPEAKER_01: very happy. I'm not very addicted to work in that sense. Okay. Okay. Sepora, we're going to wrap things
[18:58] SPEAKER_02: up. How can our listeners get a whole of you? Is there anything you'd like to add before you
[19:02] SPEAKER_01: leave us today? Yeah. Just a reminder to entrepreneurs because they are so self-motivated. We are
[19:11] SPEAKER_01: so self-motivated and creative. So is to remember the connection with our people, with our loved ones,
[19:19] SPEAKER_01: with our tribe, and to remember self-care and connection. And they can reach me at my website,
[19:27] SPEAKER_02: which is soulfulrelatinginstitute.com. Fantastic. Okay, Sepora. Thanks you. Thank you so much
[19:36] SPEAKER_02: for coming on the show. I've learned a lot about you. And I'm sure our listeners have as well.
[19:41] SPEAKER_01: Thank you, Robert. It's been fun.